Monday, April 2, 2007

yes. so fuckin sway

i admit some parts is my prob.

but u dunnid to say as if it's my duty to do so.

and am so disaapointed that the fuckin compo which i spent a fuckin cb 2.5 hours to write is out of point.

to think chinese compo is my strength
NEL WAKE UP LA
it's not the same anymore...

i'm really tired...
sometimes i really feel i'm going crazy
on the verge of breakin down..
really.

no one cares no one understands.
mayb becos i'm a cancerian
deep in thoughts.
and i really cant open up to anyone
call me a cynic..
but..
mayb i'm afraid of rejections

and sometimes...
mayb i have too high an expectations..
but the things they say hurt me.
mayb they are just kidding
mayb they dun mean it
mayb i'm petty
mayb i cant stand jokes
mayb its the truth

but

deep down inside.
it hurts.
stop the mocking. i hate it

the one who always wear a smile on their face is not neccessary the happiest ones.
at least it's the truth for me.
the agony.
it hurts
and mayb i'm weak.

yes weak.

i'm tired..
i really am going crazy.

u...so busy with ur cca. i cant tell u my probs
u...i seriously cant relate to u despite being frens for 2 years
u...u'll just laugh at me la if i tell u my probs.
u...i guess time will see whether i can relate to u.

haiz...i'm sorry guys.

cos it sounds so tempting.
and here it comes again
my future is so
bleak.

doing all i can.
to be a better man
i am really trying
REALLY.
i need some light.